In today’s economy, most employers are bombarded with resumes from keen and eager job seekers. The average employer spends around ten seconds looking at your resume. As negative as this may sound, most employers due to work overload, interviewing and sifting through the mass pile of resumes are actually looking for a reason to ‘not’ interview you.
In this increasingly competitive job market you must have a professional resume in order to stand out from your competition. The sole purpose of your resume is to make a good impression, with the hopes of obtaining an interview. If your resume is full of grammatical errors, abbreviations such as, LOL, cutesy smiley faces, and bad typo’s…. then as sure as eggs are eggs, your resume will end up in the trash!
Also, take note when applying for a position, how are they asking for your resume to be received? If they ask that it be sent in word format…send it in word format. If they ask that they would like it mailed by snail mail … then mail it, don’t email it. It may seem weird they are wanting you to lick a stamp and mail it…but this may be a test!
The main reason employers ‘specify’ how they would like to receive your resume is NOT because they like to open up a crisp envelope in the mail or that they sit there and wait for the flashing red light on their phone alerting them an email has landed in their in-box. It is to see how well you follow direction. If from the beginning you fail to follow what they have asked of you…guess what? Your resume, no matter how perfect it is, or how much experience you have crammed into it, it will end up in the trash with the rest of the other non listeners.
Keep your resume as short as possible. Anything more than two pages becomes a novel. If your resume resembles a novel or a roll of toilet paper that never ends … this too, will end up in the trash (once the employer has woken up from his nap after reading it) Focus on your most recent positions without fudging dates or titles. A slight amount of embellishing is fine, but fat juicy lies will only come back to haunt you.
Don’t show on your resume reasons why you left your past job. If you claim you left your job, because your boss was a complete buffoon that couldn’t manage her way out of a paper bag …. This too will end up in the trash. If you are lucky to get an interview, these are questions that the employer will probably ask you anyway, so leave your reasoning behind quitting for the interview itself, but still not mentioning in your interview that your previous boss really was a buffoon.
One final comment I would like to make is. Always attach a separate cover letter with your resume. A brief letter explaining why you think that ‘they’ will benefit from having you as an employee. Don’t state the reasons why you think ‘you’ will benefit from the position … this isn’t about you, they need to know how you can make ‘their’ business more profitable, manageable etc.
Good luck! (Couple more things and I will get off my soap box) … if you do get that interview:
Leave your gum out of your mouth.
Switch your phone to silent.
Dress up like you are serious about employment, without a full display of boobs (unless you are applying for Hooters, then hoot away!!)
Don’t smell like an ash tray or even try to cover it up with cologne as that will only make you smell even more like a trash bag.
Oh, and smile (without a trace of spinach in your teeth!)
Happy job hunting! 
